My Mommie was buried Tuesday and I am at a loss as to what I can say here.......

she suffered with ALS (Lou Gehrigs Disease) and it was terrible for her....

how I loved her so............

so glad that shes with Jesus now!

she earned her wings October 29, 2005

I am so restless. And heartbroken. I miss my Mommie, but her hubby says that I can no longer go over there. I can not go into it here, but I will just say this is one of the hardest things for me to do right now.......nothing......I am in prayer that the Lord shows Bill the light of day, and I am trying to have an open heart & I know that he is hurting.....but we could all be STILL working together to make this last part of Mommies life easier.

I know that she misses me. I just about cry every time I think of her. About a million times today I started to go over there, but I can not. I know that this is the test and that in order for me to grow I have to let go & let the Lord lead the way.

I didnt realize how much time I have been spending with Mommie, but its been a lot, and even thru all of this wind & rain I long to be with her. To sit on her bed.......but a kleenex on my head & stickers on my face, just to see that smile, and to touch her small, frail hand again....

I know I am assured that even if we never meet again this side of Heaven that we will meet in Heaven.....I also know that the Lord means not to heal her on this side of Heaven. I have come to terms with that. And that was something that only the Grace of God allowed me to do.

Oft times I am reminded of only the good times with her. I can no longer remember all of the awful things she did/said to me, or I her. It is truly drown in the Sea of Forgetfulness. And that is wonderful.

I went 3 years of my life never seeing my Mommie, and it was really hard a lot of times, but nothing like this. I dont know if its because I know that the end is going to come for her someday & they say soon, or if Im just being selfish. Probably being selfish. But I have peace with that because she is after all my Mommie, and I will only ever have one.

When I look at my children & think that someday they may see me with ALS, I am so scared for them. Because I know that their little hearts would break because you see the 3 of us have always been inseperable. I promised myself when I had children that I would break the cycle of abuse that my parents did and instead try to be the best Mommie I could, and I tell you I struggled with that until I received Jesus in my heart.

WOW yes, Jesus talks to me, and He walks with me, and I know that since I have been fighting the fight & keeping the faith, that someday I will hear Him tell me, well done. And I can withstand anything just thinking about that, why? Because if the Lord brought you to something, He can bring you thru whatever it is.

My heart is so tender, and I use to never want it to be. There was a time I never cried (unless it was just for me) and now, the Lord has softened it up, and I know why....He is molding me into what creation He wants me to be.

I am not perfect, but I know that my Mommie can rest easy knowing that her baby girl (me) got right with God, and will join her in glory. amen, that is some kind of peace for Mothers, I know...my baby girl was saved & Baptized & it was wonderful! I am awaiting my son, Mikey and my hubby Travis to make a committment. And I know that they will......because I have the faith. Jesus gave it to me.

Every single time I think about Mommie, I think of how she is suffering with ALS, and I wish that she didnt have to suffer like this, but I know that the Lord has a plan in all of this. Sometimes my little head tries to figure it out, but then I realize that its not my will, its HIS will. And HIS time.....

so, I love you Mommie, and I will definatley not be kept from you after death, no way no how. I will not be cussed out, talked terrible to, and talked terrible about there.......oh no........we will talk & fellowship for about a million years...giggles.......no one has ever seen the likes of us when we get to gabbing, have they, Mommie???

Oh how I love Jesus!

you know, in this world everyone is so caught up in themselves, and I guess Im included with that, because I am going to talk about me for a bit....lol...

I am no longer teaching Sunday School and that is sad for me because I enjoyed that particular part of my life.

but it ended up being Gods will because now I am working weekend 3rd shift at DFM ....a quick stop store......and I dislike it more than any of the jobs Ive ever had in my life......& thats saying a lot..

I love being a wife and Mother, and I am in prayer that the Lord will provide a way for me to stay home... and to soften up Travis' heart.

My Mother is still suffering with ALS (Lou Gehrigs Disease) and I am in prayer that the Lord heals her, and doesnt allow her to suffer with this disease.

The children are due to start school Thursday, and I am in prayer about those things too.

I pray that I am able to touch 1 person...just one...with what I say/do so that they will be led to Jesus......and know that HE is real......

if you meet me and forget me, you have lost nothing,
if you meet Jesus and forget Him you have lost everything.....
(read that somewhere)

This cup


I have this cup set before me

I know that its there, this I see.


There are so many reasons to ask for it to pass

there are so many reasons to lean upon the past


But I know that this very same cup

will soon overflow

How do I know this, you may ask

How is this I know????


Because the Lord provideth this cup

not only for my sorrow

not only for my pain

but also for tomorrow

and strength for the rain....


This cup, all be it, is heavy,

its intricate designs I see

this cup is full of something

made for me and only me....



This cup is feeling lighter now

as I feel its gentle glow

this cup is lighter, thank you Lord

for all your love you show......


This cup I have before me

that once seemed so heavy, you see

is so light when its compared

to the one you carried to Calvary...



I love you so Jesus, and I know you love me

thats why I gladly sit


with this cup as it should be

with new determination I vow to not quit


because this cup that sits before me you see?

and because you died for me



written by Kimberly Storey

Here it is, almost 1 a.m. and I am so excited about the lay out of my board for the first time since I started it......its all thanks to the help of tips and tricks & some very hard working, dedicated people who are always there to help 'needy' people like me...*grins*

I have been working 3rd shift at a discount food mart for about a month, and my board has suffered. I pray that the Lord direct me to a new job, one that doesnt require weekend only work, so that I can continue to uplift His name to all that will listen.

My Momma isnt much better. I am so scared for her, because she has reached a point in her life that I cant fix what is wrong with her....all that I can do is pray for her, and make her laugh.........just to forget the pain that Lou Gehrigs Disease has brought into her life.

When I sit and think about what the future may hold for me , it leaves me feeling afraid sometimes. Im not as brave as Mommie is, and since her 1st cousin died with the ALS (Lou Gehrigs Disease) and now they think my Grandmother may have had it b4 she died (like you can have that at any other time, huh?)....anyway, it leaves me wondering what my future can look like.

With my hubby already distancing himself from me due to the fact that a weigh a whopping 125-130 lbs, I dont know if he has the strength to see me thru a disease like that one.....

and my brother is already avoiding our Mother, shes seen him once since Christmas....how sad is that?

I know one thing above all, if the Lord has brought me to something, He will see me thru whatever that something is...amen......

Someday I will understand all of this life, but for now, I put all my faith in Jesus, who died for me.........thank you Lord /

I pray that someday, I will be able to testify to that ONE person that gets saved.........that needs my testimony.......I know that theres someone out there that needs to hear me, that needs to read my words.........thats why I put that group up, not to glorify me, but rather Jesus..........because He is sooooo sooooo good to us all, especially to me.......

I thank Him for everything, and for all of the words....and for whomever reads my poems on my site, or even this blog entry (if anyone else can read it)...........


thank you Jesus!